Six Months Out: A Look Back!

I was thinking the other day how short six months really is. When I was living and ministering in north Minneapolis, I remember when people who were new on the scene and had a passion to help change the city, and I remember my message to them. I would tell them slow down, people have to get to know you, learn to trust you, and make sure you are for real before you will be able to do what you want to do here. I remember that coming in and pushing an agenda and trying to make something happen without putting your time in building relationships tended to rub people the wrong way and trying to gain something back was more difficult. Yet here I sit, six months into our move to Tucson, feeling like I should be further along.

God's timing is not our timing. And He is very patient with us. His plans tend to work out according to His time table and rarely does it line up with ours. Apparently I have forgotten everything I used to say for advice to those moving into a new neighborhood, a new culture. If God led you here, then be patient and learn the culture. God reminded me of my own words this week and it gave me some sense of peace knowing that I am walking according to His plan, and once again I am free from having to produce results. That is His job.

So where are we now? Jean is a few weeks into her new job. She is an inclusion specialist at Cottonwood elementary school. This position gives her direct influence over 10 students and 11 para-professionals. It is definitely an adjustment for our family having her working full-time. But despite the long hours she assures me, she loves her job. She commutes to work on a scooter and loves it. That is one of the blessings of living in Arizona. If it isn't raining, you can go on two wheels.

The kids started school last week and are enjoying getting to know there new teachers and class mates. Hopefully, we won't be switching schools on them any time soon and they will be able to get into a groove. They all played baseball this past spring and loved it. There is always something going on in the apartment complex where we live and there is rarely a time they can't find a group of kids to play with. It kind of reminds us of our neighborhood back in Minneapolis. They have practically lived at the pool and are darker than probably a lot of their friends from Minneapolis. We are certainly outgrowing our apartment fast and are seeking other arrangements down the road. Now that we know where God has planted us and we have a specific geographical part of town to focus on, we can begin looking for housing opportunities.

As for me, I am quite the domestic spouse . . .NOT! I am learning to manage every one's schedule, taking more of an active role advocating for the kids. I am handling all the cooking, cleaning, homework, and laundry duties. At the same time, I have been serving others as needs have popped up. I am still ministering regularly at the Gospel Rescue Mission and have been allowed to take a more active role in ministry at our church as well. And I am starting a handy-man business. The Lord impressed this on me since I have been here. This will enable me to serve my community, build a network, and disciple men who are skilled laborers but having trouble finding work. I told the Lord how crazy that was for ME to be a handy-man. His response was humorous: Was it any more crazy than packing your family and moving without knowing where you were going? How did that turn out? Was it any more crazy than shutting down Community of Men and letting my income go with no plan in place to replace it? Well when you put it like that Lord it's not crazy at all.

So let's see what the next six months hold. More adventure as we follow our path down God's plan. I am so grateful for His invitation to journey with Him on it. 

A New Identity

I have been going back and forth with the Lord about something lately. As I await His direction and wait for doors to open for ministry, I have been trying to hold on to certain things that I thought I needed. For one, I have continued to remain employed through my ministry Community of Men and receive a monthly pay check. It has been essential up to this point because it was needed income. I am grateful for the faithful financial partners I have had and their giving has served our family greatly. But with that, I have clung to who I was in that role. I was a great advocate and resource to those struggling with sexual sin. I helped start seven different men's groups doing just that. I wrote curriculum books that have helped serve the guys and the groups I helped start.

Lately God has been asking me to give those up. He wants me to wait on Him to define who I am and what I will do in Tucson. As I have tried to make what I did in Minnesota fit here, I have found nothing but closed doors. That's not to say it can't work because I believe it can. It's just that God wants me to not get stuck on that thing, or the things I have done in the past and miss what is right in front of me.

I have been seeking the Lord earnestly about these things this week, and the Lord brought me to a study of the Biblical character Timothy. We first get introduced to him in Acts 16. He is introduced as a son of of a Jewish believer, but his father was Greek. He was well spoken of by the believers in Lystra and Iconium. Paul decided to take him along with him on his missionary journey and so begins their relationship of spiritual father and son. The first thing Paul did was had him circumcised. It said that he did it because the Jews in that area knew that his father was a Greek. I thought that was odd because Paul and Silas were bringing the decree from the apostles at Jerusalem that said that gentiles didn't need to be circumcised. As I pondered this and inquired of the Lord about it, He told me that Timothy was getting a new identity. He was known as Timothy, who's father was a Greek. And that was a stumbling block to other Jews. He would no longer be known as Timothy, the son of a Greek. Rather, He was Timothy, child of God.

It is interesting that later in the Bible we get to read about the letters that Paul sent to Timothy while he was in charge of pastoring the church in Ephesus. A young man with a large task. So much of Paul's two letters were about how a believer should conduct himself and how Timothy should focus his time and attention. He challenged him to operate not as the world does, to not judge himself or others according to what they could physically see (such as circumcised or uncircumcised), but as an example of how a believer should act. God had given Timothy a new identity. And He desires to do the same thing for us as well.

My location has changed. The people I have been sent to minister to are different than where I came from. I am viewed differently. In fact the very basis for the ministry I did in Minnesota was an openness and vulnerability. Here in Arizona, people are skeptical of people that are that open and honest. They struggle to accept them and trust them. So who I was and what I did has to change. Like Timothy, I am having to give up my old way of operating. And I have no idea what to expect. But I know who is in control of my future, and I am willing to follow Him wherever He leads. I will no longer be the director of Community of Men Ministries. I will no longer look to that ministry to provide me with a salary. For now I am a child of God, a husband, a father, a friend, and a pursuer of God's presence. Check back for further updates as I seek the Lord for His direction. God Bless!